Drag has changed my life! It is part of my gender expression. Being a Drag King is part of who I am.Not only has it introduced me to some pretty dam amazing people but it has also given me an outlet. A real honest to god outlet that feels good in a way that leads me to more balanced places. Izzy keeps me sane! For now as I try to get involved in my new city I know that I will be lead to good places. Maybe this whole experience will help me understand myself on a deeper level. Either way it could support my journey in some way that I don’t see yet.
At this point I don’t think synthetic hormones are WRONG, but I don’t think I should have to take them in order to be seen as male. Rather I believe in other options and I don’t want to be seen as male ALL the time. Still there are times I like being a woman and truly appreciate my femininity but only when I have plenty of masculine expression. Finding a way to fully express my masculine side is the struggle. For some unknown reasons living every day as simply a butch female just isn’t masculine enough.
Of course a lot has happened since then. I have allowed myself to fully explore what I like instead of what my significant other likes. Although I think its a great way to expand your horizons, don’t get lost in your SO, simple advice. He was always uncomfortable with me wearing his clothes but I liked it, and was actually more closeted about it than him. Also my call to drag has been a long time fascination. I love it over the top, the more the better. I spent so much time with queens at the queer bars during my closet years they thought I was part of the costuming team or something.
My gender is just that, its a gender, not binary but instead more like a range. I just don’t get the binary, its confusing to me.